The faierie beame upon you, the Starres to glister on you;
A Moone of light in the Noone of night
Till the fire-drake hath oer-gone you
The wheel of fortune guide you, the boy with the bow beside you
Runne aye in the Way till the bird of day, And the Luckyer lot betide you.
Ben Johnson
Today I decided it was a good day to tackle the outside lights.
Why lights mean so much to me I cannot explain but they do.
It is a feeling I get from them, One of lovely memories,
one of sheer enchantment. I no longer have children who
will do them for me, a treat I had as they entered their teen years,
so Outside I went, ladder, lights and dog in tow.
The dog is almost a year old, filled with wily ways and energy.
The day was chilly but the skies blue and
the wind was almost absent. There was also no snow to wade through, though at
this point I would actually like some. I say that with great ease,
forgetting last year I was shoveling in efforts to open the
door.
The window boxes were easy, mounded with sheet lights pulled out
of boxes, still intact. Topped with oversized ornaments I’d purchased some
years ago, they came out looking quite lovely. The old string lights, still
going strong, never made it to the gutters. Perhaps tomorrow.
During this time, the dog ran away four times, stole two large loaves of bread
put out by neighbors for the birds and caused any chaos possible. She is wound
up just like a small child by all the things so new this time of year. A tree
in the house is a great fascination and large colored lights I found, look like
treats to her.
I love this season. It holds strong energy for me. It is not the dinners or gifts,
but the quiet whispers, a stillness in the night when the sky is filled with stars.
While others are busy running here and there,
I find it a good time to listen for the voice of those who try to
speak to me. Listening has been difficult this year, my time to myself greatly limited. It has
often been infused with emotions which interfere with my ability to reach deep within
myself, a space I have much missed and one I hope to revisit more often.
Many times I have found myself at this keyboard, trying to express the words I feel but
they remain inside growing ever stronger in their quest to find a way out. For now I will
look and listen while enjoying the lights from my window.
Forgive my sporadic blogging. It is not for lack of thoughts but lack of alone time when I can gather them together in an organized fashion. Often they come to me as I am drifting between the waking and sleeping hours.
This is our newest addition, Clover. She is pictured below next to my son’s hands to give some idea how small she really is. It is a bad picture, taken from my equally bad quality phone. Also keep in mind my son is very tall with massive hands. The second shot is on my lap using the webcam. She is twelve weeks old and has been with us one week. During that week I feel as if I have returned to new baby days. I am not quite sure how I feel about it but my life is definitely shaken no longer stirred. There is never a dull moment when she is awake. Evenings have transformed into a blast from the past as her behavior deteriorates, matching the worst overtired child, until she flips a switch and can no longer keep her eyes open.
Tonight I am about to get some much needed sleep as my night shift hours are not doing well with a day shift dog. I have made some time to enjoy the stars as with the dark of the moon they are especially beautiful. While my soul sings with words the past few days, my physical self must catch up so I can weave those words into something memorable. Until that time I hope to find some sleep and perhaps some dreams as well.
A clouded dream on an earthly night
Hangs upon the crescent moon
A voiceless song in an ageless light
Sings at the coming dawn
Birds in flight are calling there
Where the heart moves the stones
It’s there that my heart is calling
All for the love of you
A painting hangs on an ivy wall
Nestled in the emerald moss
The eyes declare a truce of trust
And then it draws me far away
Where deep in the desert twilight
Sand melts in pools of the sky
When darkness lays her crimson cloak
Your lamps will call me home
And so it’s there my homage’s due
Clutched by the still of the night
And now I feel you move
Every breath is full
So it’s there my homage’s due
Clutched by the still of the night
Even the distance feels so near
All for the love of you.
Here we are the end of January. I have not done well with my blog a day endeavor. It is one of those things I cannot do, force myself to write. Words do not flow in such ways but only when they wish it seems, often at the most unlikely of times. There have been moments of clarity, moments filled with beautiful words, moments that never made it to the page. Life is like that, filled with the everyday happenings throwing obstacles in the way of all else.
Tonight I went for a short walk, a beautiful mild evening after many days and nights of bitter cold . There were no stars and the moon as she grows dark, was buried behind a cloud filled night sky. On those bitter cold nights she shined brightly down along with her veil of stars but we had to walk quickly and hasten our appreciation of her splendor. Not so tonight as the air was mild. The quiet of those bitter nights was replaced, and still is at this hour, by the hum of snowmobiles as our local festival begins tomorrow. It is the land of the winter sportsman reflected in the many events of the weekend to come. As the lights of the snowmobiles race across the icy lakes, you also see the gentle glow of light from within the ice houses as fishermen wait for their catch, perhaps relishing the peace of the now frozen water. The seasonal lights still dot the street through our little town and somehow, I like that. It gives a festive feel to a season we could be long weary of but
instead learn to embrace. The seasons move so very quickly and though I long for warmer days I know to appreciate the shimmer of new fallen snow as it paints the landscape all in white.
Tonight there is a magic in the air as there has been for the past few nights, perhaps the coming of Imbolic. It is the celebration of light, the arrival
of the Maiden or honoring of the Goddess Brigid. She brings with her the knowledge of the coming of spring. While it all seems a bit premature, February has always arrived with a sense of magic, perhaps the Valentines that fill the stores, or the cut flowers that follow in abundance. Even on the coldest of days you feel it, almost as if the Maiden whispers her arrival with a soft scent of new leaves. There will most likely be a snow storm or two before spring truly arrives, all green and fresh, but come Tuesday, I will put out my candles to light the way and celebrate the rhythm of the seasons.
Saturday has arrived all blue skies and sunshine, the type of day viewed through a window that can make you forget just how cold it is outside. The sun is a welcome visitor after working nights and seeing so much of the dark.
Night time is still a special time for me, holding a mystery and magic with the star filled sky and the moon remains my companion. Still I find myself up earlier these days and as winter continues my thoughts drift to flowers and gardens. I have never been particularly good at maintaining big gardens but this year I hope to fill my window boxes and the many pots I found and put away for spring. It has been too many summers without my own flowers though nature never fails to provide beauty for the non-gardeners.
This year finds us in a small town for the first time, and it is an experience for a city girl. We are close to most things needed as it is connected to several other small towns all in a row. The city is about an hour away. It is very new and different but our neighbors on all sides are wonderful people and there is a quiet here I find hard to explain. The sounds of nature are different, thunder in wide open spaces having an echo and deepness I have never heard before. The snow whispers and the winds make one feel like you are back in those pioneer days, hearing it howl as it moves through the trees. As I said before I have heard coyote for the first time in my life. We have seen bald eagles fly over the yard and swans migrate through, floating gracefully on the lake and then flying out in formation. We have seen white pelicans as well, another migration in autumn. There is always something beautiful to see so now we make it a point to take the camera when we go out.
There are many projects for me this year as we are in an old house built turn of the century. I am trying to find more history on it but I do know the homes one block beyond us are historical homes of the area having been built by the first settlers here. I love this house but it was decorated by those who lacked the appreciation of what they had. Perhaps I will do a photo diary of what I do on the blog though my skills with the camera are sorely lacking. The basic structure is good and the floors have been replaced nicely. The walls need some tasteful paint and it would have been lovely had the former occupants chosen to remove the old wallpaper and then paint. There is a sun porch, not big but very cute and I cannot wait to open it up again. It is not insulated so must be closed off once cold weather arrives. The woodwork around the windows, the fine old woodwork of old homes, will need some attention. The former occupants put curtain rods up leaving some damage. It is a very spacious home and one that brings back memories from my childhood. The first day I stepped through the doors I was reminded of my aunt’s home in Iowa. We would visit almost every summer and I loved that house, my aunt, and the little town.
This is my new journey, at least part of it. Where it will lead I cannot say as life is a mystery for all of us.
I guess it is pretty sad when you have to post a stat chart for lack of blogging inspiration. With that in mind I decided to take the 2011 challenge and do a post a day. What these posts will be about I have no idea but I think it could be a way to get going. It is not for lack of thoughts or things I could share, it is more the ability to share that has become the uphill battle. I tried new blogs but the words did not come with any greater ease. I thought about new topics. I decorated blogs but still no words. So I decided to just post day to day and see where it leads. It is how I began almost 5 years ago and perhaps it is time to begin again.
The wind is howling today, and the windows in this old house are rattling. It sounds like we are living in the north woods and all that is missing is the howl of coyotes, something we have heard while out by the fire pit. For a city girl that sound was something quite new and as I moved toward the door that night I was not just sure how I felt about it.
It is a new year and I am hoping a year of less change. 2010 was a bit challenging and really almost overwhelming. I think I am slowly recovering from it all and it might take all of 2011 to get there. People and places moved in and out of our lives and change brought more change until I finally arrived to a point where I can stop and take it all in. I promise to blog about it in the coming days.
Finding home is still a challenge and a roof over one’s head does not necessarily guarantee you have arrived. Sometimes the knowledge of knowing where you should be can be an obstacle when you find yourself elsewhere. While I am getting better at blending knowledge with reality, things I have seen and come to know, still walk with me every day.
There will be more to come, daily as is my new challenge, and I promise to try and say more about one thing and less of this and that in future posts. For now I am back for real this time and I hope to make this blog a good and maybe interesting place to visit.
