The last few days have been spent between working and just taking it easy. The energy I found earlier in the week remains at my very core, and though I find myself surrounded by the usual day to day worries and stresses of life, there is this feeling like all will be ok.
January has come in cold, the still air of night icy but almost beautiful, if you are inside. There is still that longing for spring and summer but I have been able to find the beauty in the unavoidable winter of my part of the country. Today things are windy, a sleet like snow blowing about, but the bitterness is gone from the air and really it’s quite pleasant outside.
Last night I sat awake in the wee hours, unable to sleep most of the night. This is nothing surprising given my work schedule of nights. Still as I watched movies, a favorite past-time being revisited, I thought about the things that have happened in my life. I remembered the wonderful moments in the past and feel as if I can carry them forward with me as I discover where it is I need to be. I sat and wondered once again, “who am I?” a question I will no doubt return to many times.
I’m still hoping to right a reflection on 2007 but I find myself launched into 2008 and it seems there is no turning back. I can certainly say 2007 was a self centered time, deeply reflective but filled with uncertainty of the spirit and soul. Perhaps now I am finding some clarity, at least a bit, and while I am still reflecting, I feel the direction to my path is growing more visible. The moon and stars seem to call my name in a voice different from before, one that has made it’s way through at last.
This last year has made me stronger, filling my path with experiences and people to help test me and help me find the way. Those little things that upset me in the past, no longer find there way in. The doubts that have filled my heart have been replaced by a strong sense of what comes to me and what I feel.
For now I find myself surrounded by this peaceful place, and I intend to savor it, knowing there are more things that will come my way, more uncertainties to face and more questions to answer. It’s all a part of things I guess, as I wander down the road of life.